wannabe model diary 1
DIARY FASHION

THE DIARY OF A WANNABE MODEL PART 1

LET’S AWAKE THE MODEL IN ME.

Hi dear readers. There’s gonna be this funny, yet weird but also exciting announcement coming up. But first things first. I decided to join a competition called ‘Style Awards’ organised by looklive. Why? I don’t know myself, it seemed so easy to take part. I needed to send in my picture presenting a look in a certain category and in I was. Choosing a topic wasn’t difficult, since I had two pictures in mind. One was a cute business look, where my smile was big and the dark blue dress tightly fit my body. The second was a bathing suit I was wearing – very colourful and eye-catching and I also had an interesting cap on. Total summer look.

MQ VIENNA FASHION WEEK.

Last week then, I received an email. They asked me if I would like to be part of a runway show at the MQ Vienna Fashion Week, one of Vienna’s biggest fashion events. First reaction: They certainly must mean my business look, since you guys gave me so many likes for that one (thanks again!) – but no. The jury actually liked my bathing suit style more. I didn’t even promote it much, so less likes than the other but it became: the chosen one.

CATS AND CATWALKS.

First feelings that came up: anxiety. Running down a RUNWAY with only my bathing suit on? Like an actual runway model. The models that need to tone their figure and perfectly walk the aisle every single time. Those that are looked at for at least 3 minutes and judged every second of their presence on the catwalk? Those CATS that a normal person can only look at full of envy? That should be me there? Almost naked? With all my faults and imperfections openly presented to the audience?

I started considering – many ways out but only one way forward. I hate one-ways to be honest. So I talked to four people: my mum (& best friend), my boyfriend, a colleague and a stranger I met that day. All were excited – positively taken aback and motivating me to do it. Only my mum, the voice, said I should decide for myself but she would be there and encourage me and watch my performance, of course, because it would be beautiful. Dear mum, I love you much.

I CAN ALWAYS RUN LATER.

But the anxiety was still quite present. And you know what, dear all, I sent the email to confirm my participation. Because I can always run, but there is only one way to grow and become a better self. Be confident even though you would rather play hide and seek and not be found – is what I thought. If I will fall, I will fall. If I will make a mistake. Let it be that way. But in the end I will have that experience to share. And if you do something, do it the most radical way you can – in a bathing suit, of course.

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